Sunday, December 14, 2008

D.C. day three.

So day three on my own in DC.
I woke up to Heather knocking on the door and cursing her stupid hotel key for not working again, stupid hotel keys. We went to breakfast/lunch at a little place called Cosi. It was very very good. I had a flat-bread sandwich with some chicken, some sliced tomatoes, fresh mozzarella and fresh basil, mmmmm. Heather went back to work and I did a quick google search to find the exact intersection to tell the taxi driver to take me to.
I hopped in the cab, "Could you take me to the National Art Museum on the corner of G street and 9th?" he responded with something that sounded affirmative. He drove for a lot longer than it looked like it should have taken on google earth and I was just about to say something to him when I saw G street and relaxed a little.
The National Art Museum was huge and it took me all day to go through it. I really liked the old Abraham Lincoln artifacts, they had a huge assortment of Civil War era paintings including a really old painting of Joseph Smith with an interesting blurb about the Mormons rapidly growing and evicting residents from their homes. Weird. Other items I really liked was the photography and portraiture exhibits and the marble sculptures. There was one such sculpture whose robe was sculpted so well I literally had to touch it to see if it was cloth or marble.
There was also a very weird exhibit. I'll try to explain in words as best I can. Imagine a room the size of a 2 car garage tall enough for a camping trailer. On one wall of this room were 16" TV's floor to ceiling; maybe about 10 TV's tall and 40 TV's wide. 2/3rds of these TV's were playing nonsense, no discernible reason to what it was showing, just video clips of very random things. Like men skiing, dancing people, cows, fences, roller skate wheels, bugs. then the other third of the TV's were all playing the same thing, which was also a bunch of randomness, save for the center TV which was playing........well porn. Well I guess it wasn't full on porn, but it was just a bunch of different clips of naked women laying on a couch doing weird things. One would kiss a woden totem-pole statue; Then one would hug a clear glass sculpture. One would try to make a cat lay next to her on the psychiatrist style leather couch, then another would push her boobs together and make a pouty face. Oh but it's okay it's art right? It was supposed to represent our plugged in world that's out of touch with reality. It was just nonsense and weirdness if you ask me. The little TV in the middle on the right up in that picture was the naughty one.

I took the Metro back to the hotel and waited for Heather to come back so we could go to her work dinner with her co-workers.
Bad idea. The dinner was at a Moroccan restaurant whose name I don't recall and it was gross. Heather wanted me to try some new foods, but this was so disgusting. Oh it can't be that bad, you might be thinking to yourself right now, but it was. To start with there was bread that was the consistency of cornbread mixed with a glue stick and the flavor of some carpet-based bread concoction. Next up, soup. The soup wasn't that bad, some tomato basil snap pea soup, which to me tasted exactly like a can of Campbell's vegetable soup, except instead the the familiar shapes and colors of vegetables, this new soup had strange shapes and most things I saw in the soup when I dared to look were white, and last time I checked, neither basil, tomatoes or peas are white right? Then after that they started serving this turnover looking thing which smell absolutely delicious and I was getting hungry after picking at my other food. The little turnover thing looked very good indeed, and then I cut it open. Apples? Honey? Pie Filling in the Center? Nope, chicken. Yep meat was wadded inside of this little turnover that was covered in cinnamon and powdered sugar, I tasted it and I had to swallow my gag.
At this time the belly dancer came out to dance which had a little too much belly and was little too old to still be a dancing, I tried not to make eye contact and told everyone at the table to avert their eyes so as not to lure her over. The main course then came consisting of "free-range" chicken and lamb Currie. I scraped all the weird looking stuff off of my chicken and ate just the meat part, tasted and very much disliked the lamb, it kind of tasted like fridge burned deer meat. I didn't get my hopes up for dessert which was a good thing because it was just honeydew and cantaloupe squares that were too soft and a very hot minty tea. I agree it's good to try new things to get yourself cultured, but I am not going to eat Moroccan again. Oh and also this all took place over a 3 hour time period, very slow service, and everyone else who works with Heather was getting drunk and trying to belly dance and/or arm wrestle anyone who was up for it. It was a fun weird night and dinner.
Long post I know.
-Reluctantly Cultured

2 comments:

Derek said...

honeydew= worlds worst fruit

~wendy~ said...

cool blog craig! (I hope it's okay for your sister to crash in and comment.)